{"id":1123,"date":"2015-07-01T10:00:58","date_gmt":"2015-07-01T18:00:58","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/alfieland.com\/?p=1123"},"modified":"2015-07-05T15:07:36","modified_gmt":"2015-07-05T23:07:36","slug":"jeff-verbet-my-very-dear-friend","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/alfieland.com\/?p=1123","title":{"rendered":"Jeff Verbet…. My Very Dear Friend"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\"Jeff<\/a>

Jeff Verbet and Al – 2002<\/p><\/div>\n

\u2026 our granddaughter Kaitlin, who was a \u2018tweener\u2019 at the time, accompanied me to our local Starbucks as was our daily custom. And as you know, their actual drink sizes are small, medium and large but that is not what their marketing guys want us to call them.\u00a0\u00a0 They prefer tall, grande and vente. On this particular morning, I noticed a new blend was brewing and Starbucks called it Blonde Roast. When the clerk took the order\u2026excuse me, when the Barista to the order, I said, \u201cI\u2019ll have a tall Blonde\u2026about 35, long legs, blue eyes\u201d whereupon this young man looked at me as though he had just undergone a pre-frontal lobotomy. It was one of those looks that Jack Nicholson threw in One Flew Over the Cuckoo\u2019s Nest. Kaitlin then rolled her eyes, shook her head and while looking at me, she emphatically said, \u201cGrampa, nobody gets you.\u201d I responded with a knee jerk reaction and out of the blue, I said, \u201cJeff does!\u201d<\/p>\n

Jeff and I met at Blue Mountain camp in the Poconos of Pennsylvania where we both worked as counselors, town boys (errand \u2018gophers\u2019 for the owners) and instructors during our summers while in college. It was a magnificent place where well to do Jewish parents sent their children for eight weeks during summer break. We used to call it the \u201cSummer Home for Wayward Jewish Children.\u201d There was a boy\u2019s side and a girls\u2019 side of the camp site separated by a beautiful lake and a mile long road which ran along a bank. There were countless pines, waterfront facilities for swimming, boating and sailing, athletic fields and courts, a lodge, stables, an outdoor theatre, two wonderful dining halls, arts and crafts shacks, a radio station, spacious cabins and most important\u2026a field office. This was the brain center for all operations and it ultimately became Jeff\u2019s and my province. We owned it!<\/p>\n

\"Blue<\/a>

Blue Mountain Camp<\/p><\/div>\n

The two of us connected right out of the gate. This initial\u2019 bromance\u2019 was predicated upon his wicked sense of humor in addition to his irreverence of everything conventional along with his disdain for authority. Nothing changed! Over the next three or four summers, Jeff took great care of the kids within his charge, but was also the bane of management. If the bosses said yes, Jeff said no; if the bosses said the sky is blue, Jeff said \u2018bluish, not blue.\u201d His immediate boss, our good friend Arnie Arnie, (not to be confused with Arnie) was driven to get Jeff fired. It was his life\u2019s mission. Everyone knew that couldn\u2019t happen because Jeff\u2019s campers and their parents loved him and would have protested loudly. And, when check writers protest, management listens. He was bullet proof! We were not permitted to leave camp after evening check-in at the field office but Jeff and I thought that rule was for everyone else. Arnie Arnie made maps of the parking lot to determine if any cars had been moved after hours. Jeff always found a way to make sure it was known that his car had moved. So much so, that even if we didn\u2019t leave the campsite, he would move his car anyway just to get Arnie Arnie\u2019s attention. Some years later, they too became good friends.<\/p>\n

The field office was an open air work station where the head counselors (2), gave direction from the throne through blaring loud speakers which could be heard from E. Stroudsburg. It was also thee place to hang out with other counselors and staff during down time and after hours. This is the venue where Jeff and I became great friends. In addition to our similar sensibilities being Philly boys of the same vintage (Jeff @ Bartram and me @ Central), we both sang with the Dovells at different times and neither of us ever recorded with them. It was our love of DooWop music and a cappella harmonies that really drew us toward the same place. We started a group and Jeff named us Marino\u2019s Marauders. I was the arranger and sang bass\/baritone while Jeff did the leads. He was great\u2026a real street corner voice that I still hear when listening to the Four Js or Little Billy (Carlucci) and the Essentials or The Earls. We sang in the field office everyday and often over the loud speakers. The kids and staff loved it but it drove Arnie Arnie crazy\u2026only because Jeff loved it. He eventually worked his way through and became a fan\u2026 then wanted in.<\/p>\n

\"Arnie<\/a>

Arnie Lupowitz with Jeff – 2015<\/p><\/div>\n

Management bought a 16\u2019 run about for water skiing. Her name was Eager Beaver. Jeff and I believed that boat was ours until it was made clear that it wasn\u2019t. It didn\u2019t matter! We took our three days off per summer together along with our girlfriends and water skied on Lake Wallenpaupack until dark. We did that with each day off for our next three or four summers. Our love of boats has remained throughout our lives. 1984 was a year of transition for me. I was leaving one career and starting another and in between gigs, Jeff invited me to spend a week with him on his 28\u2019 Bayliner to navigate the San Joaquin Delta from Discovery Bay to Stockton. It was one of the best weeks of my life. And you, his family and friends well know, he could watch boats for hours and not say a word. So can I. Music and boats connected us early on, but it was his hard biting sense of humor which best defined him and forged our friendship over these many decades. Nothing was sacred. The more you respected and admired something, the more he was inclined to discredit it\u2026not to be mean, but rather to \u2018get your goat.\u2019 Our buddy Steve described Jeff to another as, \u201cdog with a bone.\u201d He just didn\u2019t let go, and that was apparent until the end.<\/p>\n

It is no secret that Jeff and I have debated one of the world\u2019s most pressing and difficult questions\u2026 who has the bigger nose? We have exchanged nose paraphernalia and gags for decades so much so that either of us could curate our nose museums. He would stop people on the street, in restaurants, bars, docks, etc., and ask them to render judgment. Personally, I think it\u2019s a tie\u2026maybe! He pulled the ultimate \u2018hush\u2019 and I must give credit where credit is due. At Becky\u2019s first wedding in Santa Cruz, Nancy and I were sitting at the family table with Cookie and Jeff and I volunteered to get drinks for everyone. I was standing in one of three parallel lines leading to three bars. In the line to my right and about seven or eight people in front, I noticed a woman looking at me. It wasn\u2019t one of those \u201ccome hither\u201d looks (which I\u2019ve never seen,) but rather one that says your fly is down or you have spinach in between your teeth. She approached and said, \u201cExcuse me sir, may I tell you something.\u201d \u201cCertainly\u201d I replied while checking my fly. She said, \u201cYou have the biggest nose of any man I have ever seen\u201d then turned and retook her place in line. I was speechless. This unusual for me. After a few recovery moments, I turned back to look at our table whereupon Jeff along with cast of thousands were in hysterics. It was his sister-in law who was the protagonist at Jeff\u2019s instruction. Dick head!<\/p>\n

Jeff called my office and identified himself, then asked our receptionist, \u201cWho is the adviser in your office with whom I met last week? I can\u2019t remember his name but he\u2019s a funny looking guy with a tremendous nose.\u201d My \u2018former\u2019 receptionist said, \u201coh, you must mean Al.\u201d A month or two later, he called and asked the \u2018new receptionist\u2019 if he might leave a message for me. She said, \u201ccertainly, what do you wish to say.\u201d \u201cPlease tell Al that his subscription to Bestiality Quarterly has expired and I know he wouldn\u2019t want to miss another action packed issue.\u201d She too became a \u2018former receptionist.\u2019<\/p>\n

\"Jeff<\/a>

Jeff Verbet and Jerry Silver – 2015<\/p><\/div>\n

All who know and love him could tell Jeff stories ad infinitum but the trait that best describes his persona is that of a \u2018no bullshit\u2019 guy. He could get to a bottom line quickly and without ambiguity. Trusting to a fault, Jeff had little patience for slackers, morons and cheats. You always knew where you stood\u2026my kind o\u2019 guy. Funny and irreverent as he might be, a common theme ran through all he thought and did\u2026his uncompromising integrity and character. In Yiddish, this is being a Mensch. There is no greater compliment.<\/p>\n

The true test of character is measured by how one deals with adversity more so than success. I\u2019m reminded of DiNiro\u2019s line in Raging Bull where Sugar Ray Robinson is beating Jake LaMotta to a pulp. While taking a brutal whoopin\u2019, LaMotta says to Robinson, \u201cYou never knocked me down, Ray.\u201d Like LaMotta, Jeff had the rare ability to take a lickin\u2019 but never back away from what is right. He reinvented himself several times out of necessity, and each time he emerged better, stronger and wiser. This takes courage. Duke Wayne said it best: \u201ccourage is when you\u2019re scared to death but you saddle up anyway.\u201d Jeff personified this throughout his life. I\u2019ll miss my dear friend and our time together\u2026very much. How can I not see and think of Jeff when on the water, or listening to doo-wops, or reminiscing about our Blue Mt. Camp days? Like all of us who love him, Jeff lives on within our hearts and souls.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u2026 our granddaughter Kaitlin, who was a \u2018tweener\u2019 at the time, accompanied me to our local Starbucks as was our daily custom. And as you know, their actual drink sizes are small, medium and large but that is not what … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1123","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-featured-story"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/alfieland.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1123","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/alfieland.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/alfieland.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alfieland.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alfieland.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1123"}],"version-history":[{"count":10,"href":"https:\/\/alfieland.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1123\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1147,"href":"https:\/\/alfieland.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1123\/revisions\/1147"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/alfieland.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1123"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alfieland.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1123"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alfieland.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1123"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}