{"id":196,"date":"2013-02-12T12:43:12","date_gmt":"2013-02-12T20:43:12","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/alfieland.com\/?p=196"},"modified":"2024-07-11T11:56:47","modified_gmt":"2024-07-11T19:56:47","slug":"the-legend-of-bucky-goldstein","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/alfieland.com\/?p=196","title":{"rendered":"The Legend of Bucky Goldstein"},"content":{"rendered":"

The set up:<\/h3>\n
\"Seven<\/a>

Seven Spanish Angels<\/p><\/div>\n

\u2026and you thought Kinky Friedman was the only Jewish cowboy in America.\u00a0 Ha!<\/p>\n

The legend begins\u2026 While on one of our many backpacking trips into the eastern High Sierras, my good friend Bull thought we might vary it up a bit by going to Wyoming for our next venture.\u00a0 After researching the Wind Rivers, he arranged for a meeting of the usual suspects to plan the trip which would ensue the following summer.\u00a0 In mid July of 1990, seven of us found ourselves in Jackson Hole with lots of gear, two rental vans and mild anxiety about just where we were headed since no one had ever been to the area.\u00a0 After a long day, we finally located the trail head at dusk and began our trek\u2026in the rain\u2026muddy trail\u2026but in good spirits.<\/p>\n

We hiked until we could find a clearing where we might lay out our bags and try to sleep although that was a bit challenging.\u00a0 It was around midnight and pretty wet and cold, but we had endured such conditions before. \u00a0The next morning we continued on to our campsite which was comfy and close to a lake where we had easy access to fresh water and fish.\u00a0 It was a great trip\u2026lots o\u2019 stories, good fishin\u2019 and great camaraderie. \u00a0Five days later, we came out of the mountains and observed backpackers coming up the trail on horseback with wranglers assisting those \u201cdudes.\u201d\u00a0 Our collective thought\u2026 “we are stupid. Next time, it’ll be on horseback.”p><\/p>\n

Rather than going directly back to Jackson Hole once down from the mountain, we were advised by some locals to spend the night in a little burgh called Duboise.\u00a0 I made the mistake of pronouncing this hamlet as \u2018Doo Bwa\u2019 where I was corrected directly by some ol\u2019 boy who informed me of the error of my ways when he said\u2026 \u201cthat\u2019s \u2018Doo Boys\u2019 with the emphasis on the Doo.\u201d\u00a0 After checking into the Black Bear Motel (very cool place with the\u00a0Wind\u00a0River running through the back of the site) we showered, ate a great meal, drank some beer in the local honky tonk and went to bed. The next day, we learned that the Duboise Volunteer Fire Department hosts an Annual Mountain Man Rendezvous at the local park.\u00a0 We wandered around the venue for quite a while and enjoyed the local color.\u00a0 There was great BBQ, a black powder rifle contest, a black powder canon contest, a knife and hawk competition, \u2018wrasslin\u2019and drinkin\u2019 along with a plethora of characters hawking their wares at trading posts throughout the park. It was really a great event to watch and we were determined that next year we would come back to the Wind Rivers for another backpacking adventure and we\u2019d spend some real time at the Rendezvous once out of the mountains.<\/p>\n

Now to the back story:<\/h3>\n
\"Seven<\/a>

Vigilantes<\/p><\/div>\n

In August of \u201991, the \u201cSeven Spanish Angels\u201d returned.\u00a0 And yes, it was on horseback where I personally got to observe the underbelly of my horse, up close and personal, when my saddle slipped due to poor cinching\u2026a story for another time.\u00a0 Once at the campsite, we unloaded our gear and the wranglers headed down the trail with a departing salute while sayin\u2019\u2026\u201cwe\u2019ll see ya\u2019ll in a week.\u201d\u00a0 We had a great time hiking new trails, fishin\u2019 and generally enjoying good times with good guys.\u00a0 The atmosphere was light and everyone did their best to assist the other guy if assistance was necessary and\u2026 without the other guy ever having to ask. Now, here is where it starts to get interesting.<\/p>\n

I was on fish cleaning patrol with my good friend, Bill who is also known as the \u2018ol cowboy.\u2019\u00a0 He got that name \u2018cause it\u2019s who he was as young man.\u00a0 Bill quite thoughtfully handed me one of his knives to begin cleaning fish.\u00a0 Upon completion of our task, I firmly grasped the handle and enthusiastically plunged the knife deeply into the ground whereupon the \u2018ol cowboy\u2019 let out a scream with , \u201cWHAT THE **** ARE DOIN\u2019 WITH MY KNIFE?\u201d\u00a0 I responded with an emphatic, \u201cWHAT WHAT!\u201d\u00a0 \u201cARE YOU CRAZY?\u201d he yelled.\u00a0 Who said you couldn\u2019t stick a knife in the ground?\u00a0 In every old western movie I ever saw, someone always did that.\u00a0 Who Knew?<\/p>\n

\"little<\/a>

Bucky…the early days!<\/p><\/div>\n

Later that evening, we finished dinner while casually sittin\u2019 on the most comfortable rocks we could find.\u00a0 Think of that scene in “Blazing Saddles” where all the guys are around a campfire tellin\u2019 stories, lyin\u2019, scratchin\u2019, and you guessed it\u2026doin\u2019 that other thing when you\u2019ve had some beans.\u00a0 The \u2018ol cowboy\u2019 was barely talking to me. He said something to the effect that he owned that knife forever and honed the blade daily for three or four decades. I attempted to row my way back with Bill by telling my Boy Scout experience with knives and it went like this:\u00a0 I was a boy scout for maybe 10-12 minutes in a troop of all Jewish kids in Philadelphia. This alone could make for a 60 episode network comedy. We\u00a0rarely went on overnight hikes because our mothers wouldn\u2019t let us.\u00a0 A test we had to take to advance to Second Class was “Knife and Ax.”\u00a0 I studied my scout manual and was ready whereupon the Scoutmaster asked me several questions and I answered them correctly.\u00a0 He then handed me a knife and asked, \u201cAlbert, how do you throw a knife into a tree?\u201d\u00a0 While I had never thrown a knife into a tree or anything else for that matter, I leaned back and hurled that implement and missed the tree altogether.\u00a0 The Scoutmaster said, \u201cyou fail.\u201d\u00a0 No kiddin\u2019.<\/p>\n

I practiced throwing a knife into a tree for several weeks and believe it or not, I could stick a knife into a tree right handed, left handed, behind my back, under my leg or blind folded. I was ready. The Scoutmaster then retested me with questions while I anxiously waited for him to ask me to throw my knife into a tree. He then handed me an ax and asked, \u201cAlbert, how do you throw an ax into tree?\u201d\u00a0 Ummm\u2026that wasn\u2019t what I expected. I leaned back and dispatched that ax which did hit the tree but with a weak thud and it promptly fell to the ground.\u00a0 The Scoutmaster, \u201cyou fail.\u201d No kiddin\u2019.\u00a0 The ensuing weeks were occupied with very little else other than throwing axes and knives into trees.\u00a0 I had the rotations down to a science and couldn\u2019t miss with either weapon.\u00a0 The Scoutmaster retested me.\u00a0 This was now my third time out and I was so ready and my attitude was\u2026\u2019bring it, dude!\u2019\u00a0 After answering his questions correctly AGAIN, he handed me a knife and asked, \u201cAlbert, how do you throw a knife into a tree?\u201d\u00a0 Well, I had him now.\u00a0 I very casually leaned back, and threw that knife with great confidence and force.\u00a0 You could hear it whistling through its revolutions on the way to that tree and it stuck dead center.\u00a0 It took three guys to free that knife.\u00a0 Impressed with my skill, I then looked at my Scoutmaster as if to say\u2026”yeah, now what?”\u00a0\u00a0 He then said, \u201cyou fail.\u201d\u00a0 \u201cWHAT?\u201d I exclaimed.\u00a0 His reply\u2026\u201cSchmendrick (not Albert), you never throw a knife or an ax into any living thing.\u201d\u00a0 The guys sittin\u2019 around the campfire howled with laughter and the best I could get from the \u2018ol cowboy\u2019 was a half assed but polite smile.<\/p>\n

The Payday:<\/h3>\n
\"Yellow<\/a>

Infamous Yellow Warm Up Suit<\/p><\/div>\n

We found our way back to the Mountain Man Rendezvous once down from the mountain and spent most of the day just havin\u2019 a ball watching all the activity in the park. We were dressed in our cowboy duds and looked liked we belonged\u2026that is most of us.\u00a0 I was wearing my yellow warm-ups.\u00a0 I couldn\u2019t look like a cowboy if Roy Rogers\u2019 costume guy suited me up. \u00a0Loud speakers were strategically placed throughout the venue and about 20 minutes prior to each event, the announcer called for registrants to report to the site.\u00a0 The next event was the \u2018Knife and Hawk\u201d contest.\u00a0 Five minutes or so prior to that event going off we hear the announcer blaring, \u201cBUCKY GOLDSTEIN PLEASE REPORT TO THE KNIFE AND HAWK STATION.\u201d\u00a0 I know this is me.\u00a0 How do I know? \u00a0\u2018cause there are only two Jews, maybe three, in the state of Wyoming and it was Shabbas (Saturday).\u00a0 I\u2019m sure it was Jon (The Finemaster) Pomeroy who thought this might be fun and six of the \u2018Seven Spanish Angels\u2019 were waiting for me to line up since I had shamelessly bragged about my extraordinary skill with a \u2018knife and hawk.\u2019\u00a0\u00a0 I couldn\u2019t not go.\u00a0 Once at the station, the judge handed me a hawk (ax) with a sheath over the blade.\u00a0 I had a hellova time getting that cover off and while struggling to do so, some \u2018ol mountain man who had too much fire water yells out to me, \u201cDOES YA ALWAYS HAVE TROUBLE GETTIN\u2019 YOUR THING OUT?\u00a0 I responded quickly with , \u201cnot when I\u2019m over at your house, and by the way, you\u2019re low on Scotch.\u201d\u00a0 The crowd loved it and now I had to throw that ****** hawk into a target some 15 yards away where a playing card was placed in the middle of a large cut log to serve as the bull\u2019s eye. There were a dozen or so contestants and each of us was given three opportunities to get closest to the center.<\/p>\n

\"IMG_018\"<\/a>

Bullseye<\/p><\/div>\n

When handed the hawk, I leaned back and hurled as hard as I could.\u00a0 The great speed with which that ax left my hand should have been measured with a pitcher\u2019s radar gun.\u00a0 My follow through was text book like in both form and style and I watched the trajectory through the target with laser accuracy. It seemed to take forever for my hawk to hit that target. As I write this, I\u2019m reminded of Ernest Lawrence Thayer\u2019s words in the last paragraph of \u201cCasey at the Bat\u201d where he says \u201cOh, somewhere in this favored land the sun is shining bright; The band is playing somewhere, and somewhere hearts are light, And somewhere men are laughing, and somewhere children shout.\u201d\u00a0 I purposefully stop at this place in the poem without quoting the last line because this is where Casey and I part ways.\u00a0 My ax stuck in the dead center of that log and cheers went up like I had just hit a walk off homer in game seven of the World Series.\u00a0 No one in that park was more surprised than me.\u00a0 I could not believe my stroke of luck and the guy cheering the loudest was the \u2018ol cowboy.\u2019\u00a0 Everyone insisted that I do it again.\u00a0 And in keeping with my spate of unbelievably good fortune, I responded with, \u201cno, I only do this once\u201d and walked off with my prize. The best part of that entire experience was twofold:\u00a0 I couldn\u2019t buy my own drinks for the remainder of the trip, and more important, the \u2018ol cowboy\u2019 and I were good.<\/p>\n

I celebrated my 50th<\/sup> birthday in 1992 and the \u201cSeven Spanish Angels\u201d procured the Mountain Man Rendezvous poster from the \u201991 event and presented a birthday gift.\u00a0 What is attached as a side bar in this framed and mounted piece of lore is a poem written by one of the \u201cSpanish Angels.\u201d\u00a0 It reads like this:
\n<\/p>\n

\"little<\/a><\/em>\u201cThe Legend of Bucky Goldstein”<\/h3>\n

The Rendezvous of \u201942<\/em>
\nWas the best that\u2019s ever been,<\/em>
\nFifteen hundred people strong,<\/em>
\nWith booze, and blood, and sin.<\/em><\/p>\n

There was Lefty Janes and Barking Dog,<\/em>
\nAnd Dirty Jake LeGrew.<\/em>
\nThey slung the hawk and shanked the knife<\/em>
\nLike none you ever knew.<\/em><\/p>\n

But then the crowd grew silent<\/em>
\nAnd soon began to hoot.<\/em>
\nA stranger came up slowly,<\/em>
\nIn a yellow warm up suit.<\/em><\/p>\n

They\u2019d never seen one like \u2018im<\/em>,
\nProbly never will.<\/em>
\nHis name was Bucky Goldstein,<\/em>
\nBut he ain\u2019t up on Boot Hill.<\/em><\/p>\n

He\u2019s more the mausoleum type<\/em>
\nRemembered in hereafter,<\/em>
\n\u201cI\u2019ve come for hawk and knife,\u201d he said,<\/em>
\nAnd the crowd broke out with laughter.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u201cYou go first, pretty man,<\/em>
\nWe\u2019ll watch and quench our thirst.\u201d<\/em>
\nBut Bucky couldn\u2019t get the leather<\/em>
\nOff the hawk at first.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cDo you always have that problem<\/em>
\nGetting you thing out?\u201d<\/em>
\n\u201cNever over at your house\u201d<\/em>
\nBucky bellowed with a shout.<\/em><\/p>\n

He finally unsheathed the hawk<\/em>
\nAnd to everyone\u2019s surprise<\/em>
\nHe split the mark and centered the card<\/em>
\nThey couldn\u2019t believe their eyes.<\/em><\/p>\n

Three for three, he stuck \u2018em all,<\/em>
\nAnd took first prize that day,<\/em>
\nA hush fell over all that saw<\/em>
\nAs he rode away.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cI circumcised myself with a Bowie knife<\/em>
\nAnd ate raw meat for years<\/em>.
\nI was raised by a pack of old wild dogs<\/em>
\nAnd I ain\u2019t got time for tears”.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u00a0Someday you\u2019ll realize one thing<\/em>
\nAs you read them history books,<\/em>
\nBucky Goldstein\/Mountain Man<\/em>
\nHe\u2019s just as good as he looks.<\/em><\/p>\n

— Jon (The Finemaster) Pomeroy, Covina Sunrise Rotary<\/p>\n

Now see the Movie!…<\/h3>\n

The adventures of Bucky Goldstein have been captured on film (actually YouTube video) that you can now see.\u00a0 Click on the links below to bring up these two great episodes!<\/p>\n